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Readers Respond: Working With Anger in Buddhist Practice

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From the article: Anger and Buddhism
Is anger a big barrier for you? How does anger impact your life, and how do you work with anger in your practice? Share Your Experiences

Controlling the anger

The basic problem according to Buddhism, is that emotions like anger and hatred are based on projections and exaggeration, not on objectivity or wisdom, and thus basically incorrect. Buddhism teaches us that to completely eliminate these negative emotions from our mind is a lengthy spiritual process, requiring study, mindfulness, reflection and honest observation of one's own mind. To begin with, meditation is an ideal method to review a situation in which one became angry. This has the advantage that one is not exposed to the actual situation, but one can review it much more objectively. When regular meditation gives some insight into what anger is and what happens to oneself when feeling angry, then one can gradually try to apply it in real-life situations. It is a slow process, but the change in your life and the ones around you can profoundly change for the better
—Guest Lionel Wijesiri

quote NOT Lao Tzu but Junia Bretas

“If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.” This is NOT a Lao Tzu quote but a translation of "Depressão é excesso de passado em nossas mentes. Ansiedade excesso de futuro. O momento presente é a chave para a cura de todos oa males mentais." By Junia Bretas, a Brazilian motivational speaker. LMVTouw, Taoist
—Guest lmvtouw

A tried and true anger-control system

To add to the good advice given here, I want to mention the works of Dr. Abraham Low, psychiatrist and founder of Recovery International. His most valuable book, in my opinion, is "Manage Your Fears, Manage Your Anger." This is not pop-psychology. Dr. Low developed his temper-control system over a 15-year period and then tested it on thousands of patients. His main successes came from creating peer counseling groups where patients helped each other memorize and incorporate his self-management tools. It seems it's easier for patients to take control of their lives when they see others controlling theirs.
—Guest John

Think with your heart

At one time or another we are, have been or will be angry, that's normal and natural. How do we respond to anger is another matter. We think constantly, that's unavoidable, that creates more anger, so, I suggest...think with your heart!
—Guest horacios2

anger

anger is a natural response. we all have it, we all at sometime express or think it, when we recognize that we are angry and we stop for a second then that is the true recognition of self. we need not to apologize for it, and we need not continue with it. Just at the time you recognize it, stop, take a breath, and as in meditation say to yourself, "I was just angry", and you will feel it subside. Then a little while later when you are separate from the situation you can think about it yourself, and say to yourself "How could I have handled that better". You make a decision based on your past education and then next time you either apply it or recognize early that this is the environment in which you got angry and immediatly take steps to mitigate it. You are then a buddhist.
—Guest martin weber

life

imhealthy but others raound me lie or try to bring me down evrytign I do good healthy right honesty
—Guest forever young

Uncontrollable anger bursts...

I'm studying and learning, and even started meditations on my own. I still lose my temper very fast. I get impatient with faults of others. I would curse out badly, and then...I feel guilty! How can I dissolve anger or get it out of my system 100%? I want to be on the Buddhist Path. I like it...I love it, but I need to get anger demons out of my consciousness all together. I can't practice Buddhism and all if I'm angered easily...PLEASE HELP ME BEFORE I SELF DESTRUCT...SOMEONE??
—DMValentino

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Asking questions are really good thing if you are not understanding anything entirely, but this piece of writing offers good understanding yet.|
—Guest click the up coming website page

Angry all the time

It's repressed, submarined, passive-aggressive, but it fills my every waking moment, and I am aware that it is fed by fear... of nearly every change in life, "good" or "bad". It's only when someone stops accepting my behavior as "oh, that's just his way" that the anger, the impotent fury breaks through and finds shameful public expression. This article was very helpful in helping me see another way to approach the "unsatisfactory-ness" of existence.
—Guest won

working with anger in Buddhist practice

Here is a clip that will help to get over anger with compassion and metta. www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9A97-By07U short clips www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PTrls8QH www.youtube.com/watch?v=ly0dy_n3eyM www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mx6jOZ-px54
—Guest shiro.dhamma

Lao Tzu

I have a 1911 copy of Lao Tzu's "Wu Wei" so please don't profess to know all about him...he undoubtedly wrote much more than we know of....peace
—edivos

1.Sources of anger2.Anger is a fire.

A couple of points. First,we need to recognize that we may all be a bit on edge due the the economy,politics. This can set off our anger at nearby people who have nothing to do with our edginess. It can be quite calming to take a day or two off from TV news, emails, internet news,etc. The principle is simple: try to back off from things you KNOW upset you which allows you to keep your equilibrium in dealing with those around you. It has also been said that for spiritual people to pay constant attention to the world's troubles is a great wrong because we get sucked into all of that and involved with those karmas, which were not ours. The last thing I would like to add about anger is a quote from Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, "Anger is like a fire that burns everything in its path." Now as a practical matter, once you blow up at someone and reveal your deepest suspicions, opinions, etc., about them, then there is NO taking that back, especially if they know it is true. Damage done.
—Guest Darwida

Anger from War

Thanks for the article. I was in Special Forces for a long time before I retired from the Army. I noticed that anger was a feature of daily life in the Army, and especially in Afghanistan. I am trying to deal with my own anger about the the way the war went, and what happened to me. This article is very meaningful to me because it helps me see what I am really doing when I am angry.
—Guest US_Soldier

How to let go.

To let go of anger is the ideal, since it poisons one's mind and brings with it desires to do worse to others. I try to remain calm, but sometimes things happen that set off a rage spiral within me. My wife and I relocated to start work for a local charity, and when we got to the new city, found that the lady who had to make the arrangements on this side had done nothing. Instead she was spending her time sleeping with her boss. Everyone suspected, but then she tells my wife, in detail, about her affair. My wife naturally tells me. I try and remain silent, but the whole situation was repulsive, so I told my wife to fix it. She told woman's the husband, and then he confronted the guilty party, who denied everything and left. Now myself, and my wife and our two children are a hair's breadth away from homelessness. Not being angry with this wanton woman who has carelessly wreaked havoc on three different families (her boss is married) is very difficult. And I am not succeeding...
—Guest Yuki

New expectations.

It occurs to me that letting go of expectations that others will behave according to one's own code of ethics will release a lot of anger. Of course you should still protect yourself but let go of the need for the other people to change their ways. Much like a driver screaming at "bad" drivers every day, we must learn to drive (and live our lives) calmly but defensively and let go of futile rage...
—Guest Working on it....

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Working With Anger in Buddhist Practice

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